The World Is Empty

I'm back.

Which means that I was out. I went to sleep and woke up and I had windows and a door and normal walls again. It took me a good twenty minutes to work up the balls to open my bedroom door. I was afraid of what I was going to find. I've been stuck in here so long that I wasn't even sure that I wanted to find out what had been happening out there around me. Or what 'out there' even was anymore.

Turns out, that everything out there is still exactly the same as the last time I saw it. Except there are no people. Anywhere.

Seriously jarring for me. In all of these theories about other worlds, that was my biggest fear was that I would step outside into an alien landscape, or one that was twisted from my own. But it's the same old Kentigerna, just without any people at all.

The weird thing is that everything is still very well kept. I wandered into the grocery store and everything is still perfectly fresh. And in the evenings, things close, and lights go off, and the world goes to sleep. But I haven't seen a single soul. My roommates' cars were in the driveway and I took the hatchback and drove south on the highway to the city. The big city, our big capital of the province, Toronto. Not sure if that's what it's called in your world, Emerald. It's huge. And empty.

There's nobody anywhere. I thought maybe they all disappeared the day that I managed to get out, and that's why everything looks so pristine and taken care of still. But I've been exploring for ten days and nothing has changed. It's almost like a stasis has been put over everything. You'd think that there would be signs of no human care for anything, but there aren't.

I sat under the CN tower and smoked my first cigarette. It wasn't good, but it wasn't exactly bad, but it was something to do. I've never considered smoking before, but it seems like it doesn't really matter now. I don't need to eat, for whatever reason, so I figured smoking wouldn't hurt me. And even if it did, who cares, there's nobody here anyway. It's weird just walking into a convenient store and taking what I want. I feel guilty, but who am I supposed to pay? I checked the cash register and it's full of money, just as if the store was open.

The sun went down and all of the pretty lights on the tower lit up. The city always made me nervous because of all of the people, but that night it was beautiful. I walked right down the middle of the streets, watching the lights and looking up at the impossibly tall buildings. It was so quiet, but not in an eerie way. I don't know if I'll ever find anything creepy again.

Oh, and my spider friend came with me. He didn't get in the car, and I don't know if he was on top of it or what, but when I got out in Toronto he was standing next to it. And he followed behind me everywhere I went. It was kind of nice to have a companion, even a giant spider.

I keep thinking about crazy post-apocalyptic movies where there's only one dude left on earth and he goes slowly insane. I think I've past the insane part, on to acceptance. I traveled a lot in the last ten days, and ended up back here. I'd left Sadie a shitload of food, but figured she could use some attention. I was almost afraid she would be here when I got back, disappeared with everything else, but she was here, and she was a little pissed at me for being gone for so long. But I raided a pet store for all kinds of treats and toys so it didn't take her long to forgive me.

I'm thinking of taking a trip across the country, seeing things I never would have had the balls to go and see because of money or horrible social skills. I could get a nice cat carrier for Sadie, maybe find an SUV so that Mr. Spider can ride in the back. I don't know. I keep thinking that I'm so cool about this because I'm in shock, but I'm not so sure. I'm mostly trying to figure out what's going on. But somewhat excited about the adventure that awaits me. In any case, I'll be bringing supplies with me so that I can update on the road. In the meantime, I need a nap in my bed, and we'll see what tomorrow brings.